Emergency Contact

When you lose your husband to death, there are things that you will have to deal with that you never thought you'd have to.

One is, when going to a new doctor's office, I had to fill out all this paperwork. My eyes glanced down to the row where they ask for the name and number of your emergency contact. For the first time in 20 years I didn't know who my emergency contact was anymore. My eyes immediately filled with tears, and I had to steel myself to prevent a full-on melt down right there in the lobby. I hurriedly scribbled down a new friend's name and number, making a mental note that next time I see her, I need to let her know that she won the prize of being my emergency contact.

That was a shock. It's moments like those where you are hit suddenly with the realization that "your person" is no longer alive and is no longer the one that people could get a hold of if I had some sort of emergency at work or the doctor's office. It really knocks you over mentally and emotionally.

Another crappy thing to deal with is that sometimes the younger generation doesn't know what "passed" means. This happened a few months after my husband died and I had to call the cable company to cancel. I told them I needed to cancel it because it was no longer needed and that my "husband who passed" created the account. The customer service rep asked what the name was on the account and I said my husband's name and that he had passed. They then went on to say that only the account holder would be able to cancel the account. And I asked "How is that going to work exactly?" And they said, "Well, is he there? I can just talk to him to verify." I was thinking to myself, are they really that stupid?! So, I said, "Do you not understand what "passed" means? He's dead. My husband is dead! So, no, he cannot come to the phone." They gasped and apologized and said that in that case I would have to bring a copy of the death certificate to the corporate office so they could close the account.

So yeah... not having my emergency contact anymore hurts more than you can ever realize.

~Kat